Care Beyond Performance

Metaphorical Narrative

A child reaches for care, but a hand is pulled back. The message is clear: be good first. That silent agreement follows into adulthood. Relationships carry a hidden price tag: perform, prove, deliver — then maybe you’ll be cared for.

But imagine if care were simply given, without performance. The loop breaks, and the hand never pulls away.

Core Insight

Ego authored a contract: care must be earned. It then fuels worry, striving, and shame to keep you loyal. But the contract is false. Care isn’t earned. Care is available now, unconditionally. Recognizing this dismantles the entire performance identity agreement.

Saturday Experiment

For 24 hours, act as if care is unconditional. Test it in three ways:

1. Offer yourself care without tying it to performance.
2. Notice how people still give care freely when you don’t earn it.
3. Catch the worry voice — and remind it the contract is void.

Sunday Reflection

Journal in third person:

• How did their ego try to enforce performance rules?
• When did they receive care without performance?
• How did unconditional care feel in their body?